New Shoes

Kimmie has new shoes. They are really cute. Everyone agrees that they are cute. Everyone, but Kimmie. She is having more trouble adjusting to these than she usually has. We're not sure why. She says they hurt her feet but we can't feel anything that would hurt.

At first we did not send her to school in them. We had her wear them on a Saturday when we were doing some shopping, so she could get used to them and break them in a bit. We even went to the mall. She walked pretty far in the mall and then all the way back to the car. She rode in a cart at another store and left her shoes on. She walked around another store and didn't complain.

On Monday we decided the shoes were ready to be worn to school. Evidentally, NOT. They didn't say it was a big problem at school, just that she took her shoes off a lot. But on the bus, that was another story. They said she took her shoes off and threw them at others on the bus.

Hummm. We decided she would wear them at home until she was doing better with them and sent her to school on Tuesday in her old shoes. The bus driver and aide looked her over when she got on the bus and said they were really glad she was not wearing the new shoes.

Wednesday evening we were going to church, so I put the new shoes on her. She walked around the house fine, getting together the things she wanted to take with her. She went out to the car and off we went to church. A short time later she had her shoes off and proceeded to scream at them and us . . . all the way to church. Her sister took the shoes away from Kimmie and we told her she didn't have to wear them until we arrived at church. This didn't help. She continued to scream. She wasn't happy with the shoes on and she wasn't happy with them off.

When we arrived at church, she put the shoes on and walked into the church and was fine. When we sat down for the Bible study, she took her shoes off. I immediately moved them out of the way and told her she could go without them while we were there. Fortunately she was quiet until after the study ended. Once it was over, she wanted her shoes and sat there and screamed at them.

She always fusses when she gets new shoes, but usually after one wearing, she is fine with the shoes. I'm not sure if this pair will ever get back on her feet. Right now they are sitting along the wall in the family room where we can admire how cute they are, even though she won't wear them.

--Mom

Shoe Shopping

Shoe shopping is one of those experiences that ranks right up there with doctor and dentist appointments. Kimmie's phobia of new shoes is almost as bad as her phobia of bandaids. She fights both with all her might. It makes shoe shopping lots of fun!

It all started years ago when Kimmie was just a baby. At 9-months, she wasn't rolling or sitting or crawling. At the doctor's recommendation we took her for physical therapy. As the physical therapist worked with her through rolling and creeping and crawling and pulling up, it became apparent that Kimmie's feet rolled in. The physical therapist recommended an orthopedic doctor, and he ordered plastic inserts to be made to keep her feet from rolling in.

The ordeal of having these plastic inserts made was the beginning of Kimmie's phobia. Fortunately, once the plastic inserts were in her shoes, where she couldn't see them she didn't think about it much, but if we had to take the inserts out for any reason . . . HYSTERIA! When we went shoe shopping we would have to take the inserts out to see if they fit in the new shoes and then try the new shoes on Kimmie. Trying to hold her leg still enough to get the shoe on was a challenge, and we are talking about a very tiny 2-year-old.

Kimmie has not worn the inserts since she was about 4 or 5, but shoe shopping has not gotten any easier. She fights putting any new shoe on. It continues to be a challenge to get a new shoe on her foot, and to keep her from instantly kicking it off.

--Mom

Child Care Part 2: Kimmie's Calling

As I have searched for child care for Kimmie, I often find myself griping to Dad about how I hate leaving her with strangers. I never know if they are going to fall in love with her or if they are going to consider her to be a nuisance and problem. Will they help her with lunch? Will they help her use the restroom? Which leads me to a whole other area of concern related to lack of privacy with a new set of caregivers tending to Kimmie.

The last time I was fuming about this, Dad turned to me and pointed out that it was also a new set of people who will be touched by Kimmie. I had to stop and think about this. I had not ever given any thought to what God's purpose and calling for her life might be. I had not thought about God having a purpose or calling for her life outside of her impact on us.

It's something to remember. Either through a care program or through taking her out to other activities, it's important that she has the opportunity to share her love, her hugs, her laughter and her joy with people, whether they be family, friends or strangers.

--Mom

Child Care Part 1: The Juggling Act

Child care is an ongoing issue that we have.

For years when Kimmie was in after-school care or summer programs we worried about whether she was being taken care of ok. Are they helping her eat? Are they taking her to the restroom regularly? Is she safe?

Then, a year and a half ago, we lost our child care. At 16 years of age Kimmie was no longer allowed to attend child care with elementary and middle school aged children. It didn't matter that Kimmie is physically about the size of a 9 year old, or that she plays about like a 5 year old, she was 16 and could no longer attend the child care.

Since that time our family has juggled Kimmie's care. Her sister is the primary after-school and summer babysitter. When she is unavailable, brother and grandparents sometimes step in to help or Dad or I sometimes take off work to be with Kimmie.

We tried a couple other options last summer, a day program for adults with developmental disabilities and a summer program for teens with disabilities. Kimmie required too much supervision for the adult program and they cancelled her. The teen program was a little scary since some of the youth were combative. One attacked me when I was picking Kimmie up.

Kimmie likes going to care programs because she likes playing with different toys and it helps break things up so she doesn't get bored.

It's an ongoing challenge that we have to make sure Kimmie always has someone with her and is taken care of properly.

--Mom

Such a little stinker

I had a meeting with Kimmie's teacher and speech therapist this week. Her teacher was telling me a Kimmie story that I just have to share. She is such a little stinker.

In our schools there is a lot of testing that the state requires in an attempt to gauge how well the schools are doing at teaching the kids. They even require the special education students to be tested and graded. Kimmie's teacher gave her a series of these tests recently. The teacher would read the question to Kimmie and Kimmie would choose her multiple choice answer. When taking the first couple of tests Kimmie picked a multiple choice letter, like"b" or "c", and she put this as her answer for every question.

When Kimmie's teacher was giving her the next test, she said to Kimmie something like, "You know that the answer to every question is not going to be "c", so lets mix up the answers this time."

According to Kimmie's teacher, Kimmie guessed and did mix up her answers. When the test was graded, Kimmie scored 100%.

I have shared this story with the rest of the family and we have to wonder if she guessed or if she knew the correct answers. It seems improbable that she could answer all the questions correctly guessing. We know that she has an exceptional memory and receptively knows and understands a great deal. Her disabilities are mostly in expressive areas like communication, cooperation and behavior.

I don't know what the test was about, but I tend to think she knew the correct answers.

She is such a little stinker, and oh, so smart.

--Mom

Sing along

Even though Kimmie is non-verbal, she likes singing. Well, she likes some songs.

She usually asks me to sing from Aladdin - the one where he is marching into Agrabah with the magical troupe to impress Princess Jasmine.

At church, she likes some of the songs -- she will even sign part of the lyrics that she knows.

But, her one solo is from The Jungle Book. "We're your friend" features Mowgli, the Vultures -- and the fearsome tiger, Sher Khan. Khan is a basso profundo, but for reasons known only to her, Kimmie has adopted the closing line of his low bass "that's what friends are for" for her only predictable sing along.

For the uninitiated, it sounds more like a big yawn than singing.

I once read that it was better to sing off-key but with great enthusiasm, than be technically perfect with no soul. She would never pass an Amreican Idol audition, but there's no question about her intensity and her joy.

--Dad